Hi friends, thank you for stopping by to read my blog post today. We all have many journeys that we go through in life and so I thought I would share some of the journey I have walked through in my life. This is my Journey… I am a 33 Year old mom of a sweet little 5 year old boy.
I was born and raised in Texas, and have lived there all of my life up until about a year ago. I have had many journeys in my life that I have gone through, as many of us do. Although I had many my new journey happened a few years ago.
My new journey in life started shortly after the birth of my son. Let me catch you back up, so about 6 1/2 years prior I met a man. He was really nice and sweet. We had dated a while. Then right before Christmas I had major oral surgery to have my wisdom teeth taken out. I was going through the recovery process of it and continued getting really sick. I was at work and not feeling well at all so I called the surgeon who did the work on my mouth. We looked into everything that it possibly could be from the operation and the only other option they asked is if I could be pregnant. I was like no, there is no way. I met the guy I was dating at the time for dinner. I shared their thoughts with him over dinner and we decided it would be best to stop at the store to buy a pregnancy test. So we did.
I took the test and waited for the results, they read that I was pregnant. I had a client that owned a Christian Clinic that helped minister to women to help those that might have been raped and or didn’t want to have their baby or wanted a abortion or to give their baby up for adoption. Now please understand If they confirmed that I was pregnant I wasn’t having an abortion and I was not raped.. I called her at 12:30 am and she picked up the phone. I woke her and her husband up. She took my call. She got me in the very next day. I met her at the front desk as scared as I could be. Not because I was pregnant but because I was so scared to tell my family and friends. I was raised that you get married then you have a baby. So I knew if i really was pregnant that I would have disappointed a lot of people.
Sonogram of Trey at 3.5 months.
I filled out the paperwork for the clinic and I was called back shortly after that. I will never forget seeing her when she came around the corner she looked like an angel. She took me back to her office and spoke to me and prayed with me first. I explained in detail what took place. She said that since I had a recent medical procedure and was put under I needed to see a doctor asap. So she called and they were able to fit me in. As we were waiting on the time for me to go over to their office, she showed me around the office and told me what all they did and their ministry in depth. I told her If it showed that I was pregnant that I didn’t want to have an abortion or give the baby up for adoption. I didn’t believe in that. I believe that it is my responsibility to care of this baby that God blessed me with.
This is me at 9 months in my pregnancy.
She received the call that the Doctor was ready for me. So she actually went with me over to the office. As we were walking she was reassuring me that she would be there for me and hold my hand each step of the way, She did just that. I had a internal sonogram done. As he was looking on the screen she was holding my hand and catching all my tears. Then the doctor said would you like to see your little blessing. I said yes sir… So he turned the screen and there was a very tiny little spot that was fluttering. He said that is your baby. I cried even more of course, while he was figuring out how far along I was. He said that I needed to keep a closer eye on the baby because of the operation that I had just gone through. He then gave me pictures of my baby.
As my angel and I were walking out of his office she asked me how I felt. I said amazing but that I was worried at the time. She asked me what I was worried about and I said nothing about having the baby but what do I say to people and my FAMILY!!!! I will be hated and judged and not liked and I wasn’t raised that way. I was raised you get married you move in together and then you have kids. This was my angels response. ” Do you see those stones?” I said yes ma’am “she then proceeded pick some up and then she said this to me ” People that talk about you and judge you have no room to talk because the only one that is perfect is Jesus Christ. So Remember that they are not perfect and have no place to treat you like that. They are casting stones that they should throw at their self.”
Judge Not Lest Be Judged! And Let Him Who is Without Sin Cast The First Stone. John 8:7
On to the next part of my journey was my pregnancy. Over the 9 months that I was pregnant I was faced with many things. Things a girl like me thought I would never go through, but there was much joy in this time too. So I was faced with being asked to have an abortion after telling my boyfriend that I was really pregnant. I showed him the pictures and shared the story of the day. We went a few days later to tell his family first upon arrival to their house he asked me one more time if I was sure that I wanted to keep it. I again said YES!!!! We told his parents first because they were not the type of people that really we were worried to go to. Their family morals and my families were not the same. Although they were disappointed in our choices they were excited shortly after that. His mother asked us if we were keeping the baby. I immediately said yes, but that he wasn’t sure he wanted to keep it. She said whatever happens between the two of you please let me see my grandchild.
A few months into my pregnancy I told my family. They were not happy at all as I expected and I had a lot of judgement placed on me and a lot of family that didn’t speak to me. About 7 months later I lost my job from the company I had been with for a really long time. So I started doing a lot of contract work to keep income coming in because my boyfriend was let go from all of his jobs that he had. My family was starting to warm up back to me, well some of them were. Still had issues with others. It was just something I didn’t worry about to much. I just looked for the positive and remembered what My Angel told me. We also found out we were having a boy. That was really neat..
Fast forward again and 9 months later in August my boyfriend and I were married. My grandmother said it would be best to do that before we had the baby. When really we should have waited. We were given a baby shower for him. I found out that at the end of my baby shower my husband had cheated on me. So I was just married not even a few weeks found out he cheated and had my baby in the same month. My son was born on August 29, 2010 and my entire world changed. He was precious and I fell in love. I also ended up having a emergency C-Section due to some issues at the hospital, so I ended up needing some extra help. So I had to move in with family because my husband and I were on the fence about a lot of things. We were in counseling but it was not going well. He came and went during this time he had been with a woman that he is still with today. He threw all of mine and my sons stuff out of storage changed the locks and I ended up losing everything I had and my son had. He was living between his girlfriend and family members. He told myself and my family that the baby and I were not his responsibility, from that point on I never saw him again. I went to counseling to a wonderful pastor that helped me through the process my husband didn’t show up to a few sessions I went to them all by the end of it I met with the counselor and he said it is OK you have done everything that you can it will be fine. So I proceeded to contact a attorney. I had to file for divorce something that I never wanted to do but something I knew I had to even after begging for my husband to stay and come back and everything that I did wouldn’t work. Because it takes two whole people and God in the center for it to work. It was only one sided in this case. He didn’t want anything to do with my son let alone me. It took us a long time to serve him and it was like he turned ugly over night. It was definitely a trying time during this process and it was very stressful. But I kept remembering what my angel told me.
Granny holding baby Trey at only a few days old.
Flash forward now, I have been divorced for over 5 years and my son is now 5 years old. I was told by many that I would never make it and that I was a failure. I went through many hardships even before this marriage and my son. I was raped at a young age and molested at an even younger age. I was abused in a few relationships that I was in as well. My life had a lot of bad and negative, But I say all of this because when my son was born I found a relationship with Jesus Christ. That was thanks to my Grandmother who had salvation preached at her service when she passed away shortly after my son was born. She knew she would have someone there that wasn’t saved and that someone was me. Her only granddaughter.
Trey, 4 years old, and I, 33 years old, back home in Texas in a field of bluebonnets.
Although we all may face similar journeys and some maybe not so similar we can always remember that there is someone always there for us. When we think that there is no one, there is someone and that someone is Jesus Christ. No matter what a you may go through in life just know that you can always turn to him and he will never fail you.. Please feel free to share your thoughts and a journey maybe you have gone through in your lifetime.
