PLEASE READ TO THE END!! IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM ANDREWS MOM!!!
Please read to the very end. I’m sure it will hopefully be worth it. It’s an official call to arms. It’s everything I’m feeling and more. It’s my plea to you. To your heart. And I really hope my friends whose names I used don’t get upset or mad at me.
As the time to Andrews 9 year cancerversary gets closer (9/16) I have been very emotional. The last 6 months or so have been very stressful for our whole family. Michael’s dad’s diagnosis, my own family’s health issues and the loss of our Granny. See, very stressful. But last night was the hardest night yet. We are in a very tight knit community, one where you see kids with cancer every single day. I’m friends with the parents, and not a day goes by that I do not see a picture or a story about one of our special friends. I’ve seen kids beat cancer. I’ve seen kids beat the same type of Brain Tumor that Andrew has. I’ve watched some of these children relapse and fight again. I’ve read stories of children with cancer being singled out by bullies. And worst of all, I have seen children die. When we first entered into this community, we met and I absolutely fell in love with one special boy and his entire family. Many of you will know who I am talking about when I say his name was James. James was the first of many that I grew to love. And not a day goes by that I don’t think of James. And then there was Dillon. I have been able to watch Dillon grow up to be such a great young man. He recently went to Las Angeles without his mom and I remember thinking oh oh my, I can’t be that old. Is he going to be okay. I was genuinely worried for him and constantly checking his mom’s Facebook (trolling if you will or creeping or whatever the kids are calling it) until until I saw he was home. I could go on and on about kids I’ve watched suffer, kids I’ve watched thrive. Kids I brag about to my friends as if they were my own. Kids I have mourned over. And things that really show me that our minds are not equipped to understand the “whys” of it all. But last night’s breakdown was probably the most emotional I have ever been aside from 9/16/2006.
It started as a typical Friday. Well, not really typical. It was September 11th, an already emotional day for most. It was also my best friends birthday. But soon my heart was broken as I learned we lost another child. Michael and I had only met Micah in April at the Children’s Cancer fund fashion show. We met his mother then as well. We seen them both again in July when Andrew and Micah left for Camp Esperanza. What really broke my heart about Micah’s passing was how quickly things fell apart. My memory is not what it once was, but if I remember correctly, in July, things were going well for Micah. And now, he’s gone. With the blink of an eye, the worst case scenario happened. In this group, we’re all aware of worst case scenarios, as they are beat into our brains by the doctors upon diagnosis and throughout treatment. But we all hope and pray for best case scenario.
Then later on in the evening I read another story from a mom who lost her daughter to Ependymoma (the same type of tumor Andrew has) a little over a year ago. See part of being a cancer mom and dad is to advocate for our children. To spread awareness so that ultimately we can wipe childhood cancer off the face of the earth so that maybe you don’t have to go through what we have had to endure. So this lady “painted her town gold” by putting up signs and gold ribbon to help spread awareness. Only to be told the signs “didn’t bring a positive message”. Really?!?!?! I’ve begged and pleaded with many people in my community to do things to bring awareness. And I’ve gotten a little accomplished. I think the Quinlan area area is somewhat more aware. But I would never expect people to complain that my advocacy brought a negative message to the community. When I read that, after thinking about the loss of Micah all day, I pretty much “hulked out”. My best advice that I usually give people going through any kind of struggle is “focus on what you can control and don’t obsess over the things you can’t control”. So I had to quickly move onto focusing my attention to packing the boys up to go camping. Today I felt a little better than I did last night but not much. Just thinking about all the kids we lost and how people today just don’t care. Yeah, my family and friends care. My cancer parents family and friends care. People who have witnessed it or gone through it care. But that’s about as far as it has reached. The way I see it, you can read through this until it says …continue reading, or you can scroll right past it. Very few people will go gold in September. The government will not hear from many people that 4% of funding alloted to pediatric cancer research is not enough. And I’m sure people have unfriended or unfollowed me on Facebook because they are tired of hearing about Childhood Cancer. And that’s okay. I might get some prayers, which I absolutely love. I might get some positive feedback. I might get some compliments about how strong we are (which is thoughtful, but we’re not strong). But I never see many people changing their profile picture to gold. I don’t see gold ribbon all throughout my town. Therefore, things will never change. We will never get the funding and unfortunately tomorrow 46 kids will be diagnosed with cancer and 7 will lose their battle. And the next day and the next day. And I pray each day that it’s not another friend whose child will get diagnosed. Because since Andrew was diagnosed, Lisa, Kaitlyn, Nate, Kacey, Braden and Carson have all since been diagnosed with either cancer or a brain tumor and we knew them or their family prior to their diagnoses.
So I’m officially calling the troops. If you have a healthy child in your life think about how your world would be turned upside down if your child was diagnosed. I’m begging each and every one of you to please start spreading the word. Please start telling people about the 46/7 statistic. If you have time write a letter to your senators or congress. Please go gold. I want the world to be educated. I want people to know cancer doesn’t care about age, social status, race, gender. Cancer doesn’t need you to “plant the seed”. Cancer does not need you as the parent or the child to do anything. It just happens. One day your child is the picture of health. The next day, BOOM, they have cancer. We need to wake up. Stop caring more about where the Kardashian’s are or what they are doing. I promise the new fashion trends will not matter to you if you ever hear your child has cancer. Your $200 Michael Kors bag will be puked on. Things in this world will not matter to you anymore. The only thing that will matter to you is why is there not enough research? Why is there not enough funding? Why do people not care. Those are my “whys” now. So please, I beg of you, do something, even if it’s just tying a gold ribbon on your mailbox, but do something that shows you care. And if you feel passionate enough, write a letter. Demand more funding. Tell your friends about these amazing kids. And spread awareness. Thank you for listening. Sorry it was so long. #gogold #childhoodcancerawareness #myheart #mybravelittleman
